Wednesday, November 23, 2011

"Dabby Peedles"

It says:  "I love Dabby Peedles" and I recieved it from Z about a year ago and, honestly, I hope I never lose it.  You may wonder why it speaks to me so, which may be a bit difficult to explain.

Here's the truth, I am a 'failer,' not to be confused with a 'failure,' a failer, one who fails.  I feel strongly that a person should fail.  I mean really Z failed here a great deal (that 'b' 'd' think gets a lot of kids) but, is his message difficult to understand, muddled or confused?  Certainly not.  Did it stop him? No.  Do I treasure this unsolicited  gift?  Yes.  I will forever be Dabby Peedles if I have to.  He certainly got the one word right, love.  That was his message.

"Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better."   Samuel Beckett said that, and I use it as a mantra sometimes.

"Fail better."  Doesn't that truly describe the maturation process, the growing up that lasts a lifetime?  I sometimes watch my boys struggle at what seem to me to be the simplest tasks.  I watched on in near agony for an hour as they both tried, and failed, to make the five pointed star that you and I render so casually.  They came out so lopsided and hopeless, metaphorical and actual hair was pulled out and anguished moans of frustration rose up from our dining table, where a great deal of failures and successes begin. They got better at it, failed better if you will, and now, well, perfect stars litter many drawings of night skies, stars decorate race cars and firetrucks, sheriff's badges, golden and perfect, are worn proudly.  In fact, there for a while I got pretty damn tired of stars.

I love my kids, I love to watch them succeed, but, I also love to watch them fail, for that, I think, is where character begins.

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