Monday, May 13, 2013

The Second Post-Mother's Day Post

I think Mother's (it's never been clear to me if it is possessive or not) Day has outdone it usefulness.  I think the same of Father's Day and the vast majority of Hallmark Holidays but, I'm a grumpy old fart so that's beside the point.

The original intent of Mothers (I like it better the other way) Day, was to...

An aside.  I went to wiki and found this:  She (Anna Jarvis, founder of the original Mother's Day) specifically noted that "Mother's" should "be a singular possessive, for each family to honor its mother, not a plural possessive commemorating all mothers of the world."

That clears that up.  And, apparantly I am not the only one frustrated by the commercialism of the day.  Anna Jarvis herself grew weary of it all as well, in the 1920s.

You know what?  Here's a link to the page.

The commercialism of holidays is not my rant today, however.

I just going to blurt it out because I can't find clever way to get to this.  I think Mother's Day makes a lot of people, moms and dads, feel bad.  It's not so much the expectations of gifts and cards and book-bag cuteness that makes it difficult.  It's not dinner reservations and flowers, brunches and trips to the local farm place for pansies and vegetable starts that make us feel bad.

It's more fundamental than that.  Roles are changing have changed and the whole vibe of the day has not.  The cards are ridiculous, thanking mom for the cooking and raising the kids and cleaning and all that, when those things are more often shared these days.

My wife brings home the bacon and I fry it up, thank you very much.  Where's the card for that?  If we're thanking someone for maintaining domesticity, well, uh, thank you very much, I do do a great job.

Okay, well, that's not my point really either.  Ugh, I am digging a hole here I don't know how to get out of.  (I'll throw in a sentence ending in a preposition, to distract you while I think abou this.)

Here's the thing - it is plumb impossible to talk about Mother's Day without getting sloppily sentimental and trite.  I mean, have you seen the cards?  You can only say thanks and I love you in so many different ways.  Accolades and cute epithets amuse and entertain, but, seem sadly off the mark.  Addressing motherhood is daunting and impossibly complicated; how do you thank human nature and biology and love?  How do you say I love you to the wind, it already knows.

And I guess that's my point. 

So, instead of being getting "sloppily sentimental and trite" I sloppily did this sentimentally trite thing instead.

Yep, a picture of me, on the bias, holding a picture of the boys as babies.  I framed and wrapped it in tissue paper and gave it to her at breakfast

I'll wait while you get a Kleenex.

My wife, Marci, is the mother of Nick and Zack.  And, that changed everything.  I don't have to go on and on here; the wind already knows.

From Marci's "... things you don't expect to hear from the backseat ..."
So we parked our car next to a cop car, with the cop sitting in it with his windows open.
We got out of our car, and Nick promptly, and adamantly, tells the cop (complete with his little hands up in the air), "I have never robbed a bank in my life!"

I saw the whole thing, officer, that child is indeed a smartass ...



  1. Excellent gift. :)

    We got our brother in law live rock crabs for lunch and brought them down when we went to see my MIL on Mother's day (we brought her lobster for lunch). Why? Becasue he is more of a mother to his kids than their actual mother ever will be. Sadly, their youngest was going for a visit when we got there. He's 7... almost looked like he was going to cry when he realized he had to go spend time with her.

    In fact, for years my kids have made me father's day gifts.

    I agree... it's not the holiday it used to be.