Twelve years ago this journey began. Our twin boys were six and I initially just wrote about the cute stuff they did. In fact, the name of this blog came to be because one day I heard them chanting “ihopeiwinatoaster; ihopeiwinatoaster” over and over in the basement. Time passed, I tried to go a little deeper, say important things. However, those cute boys are at university now and their stories are their own. So, what’s an old blogger to do? Well, I guess that’s what I am trying to find out.
Friday, April 17, 2015
Arbitrary Good and Evil
It's "Wordless Friday" right? Or is that Wednesday? No, Wednesday is "Post What You've Already Posted" day, isn't it? No, that's Thursday. Maybe it's "Silent Sunday" but isn't that the same as Wordless Wednesday, I mean Friday? I know, Wednesday is "Words on Wednesday" and Tuesday's "Twofer Tuesday" and... I can't keep it straight. Maybe I'll just wait until tomorrow, Saturday isn't anything yet, is it?
I was going to just post some images and go. It's nice and there's yardwork and housework and stuff to do. (Did you know that housework is a word but yardwork is not. Is this something I should become outraged about? I can't figure what I'm supposed to get upset about these day.) So, I was going to lay some images out here and go...
... it seems I am incapable of that.
This was, honest to God, crumpled up on the floor under the boys' dresser. I was dysoning (not a word) and was getting the corners with that little tubey (ibid.) thing and this shmucked (nope) up into it. I uncrumpled (really, that's not a word?) it and, well, wondered.
I know you've seen this concept before. The boys like a show called "Brain Games" and this was one of the many 'lusions (not a word but the apostrophe makes it so you don't have to figure if you need allusion or illusion ) the show has shared with us. But that's not the point.
I found this among a stack of papers on their dresser.
I could, of course, tease about the spelling of "forest" which is right, but I thought it was forrest, or wonder about the castle on the hill and the shadow doorway there on the left. And that font...
But, that's not my point either. I turned this over when I scanned it and this dapper dude was on the other side staring me down.
I might now wax poetic about self-perception, or ties, or patch pockets, but, hey, I don't know this guy. I had no idea he even existed until just now.
And that, that is my point.
Slowly, unperceptibly (ibid.), we get to a point where we don't know absolutely everything about our kids. I understand that I miss a lot when they are at school, anyone whose been around here before knows I've been inexhaustibly pleased with the surprise fodder that comes home from school, in fact it's a label in my Topics Cloud Thingey, Thingee, (nope, neither one words). However, when they are here I usually know what they are up to. I'm famous for listening around corners as they draw or play, they tell me their stories and I mine before bed, I watch from the window as they run and imagine and silently shout through the back yard. I don't spy on them, really, I just... yeah, nevermind (how's that not a word?).
"My nearly seven [eight] (now nine) ((now ten)) year-old twin boys concoct, devise, arrange, invent, write, say, imagine and dream the damndest things." That's a sentence from the explanatory blurb right up there at the top of my page here. (You're right damndest is not a word either.) When I wrote that nearly four years ago, I naively thought that I'd be privy to all of it. As they grow up - and out, really, in a social way - I find I know less and less of their business, if you will. By that I mean their daily affairs and plans and such, not more personal stuff... well, I don't want them to not tell me stuff, so I'd welcome hearing about their personal stuff - struggles and angst and unrequited like and not fitting in and... I know about that.
It's stupid that I didn't see this coming, it's a natural step in the march that is childhood. These guys are marching out of our lives, that's their job, and mine, mine is to show them the damn way. I have to understand I'm not always going to know everything about them.
I hope I know enough.
I sorta messed up. You might remember that five-hundred-and-ninety one words ago I said I was just gonna post some pics and dash. Yeah, well, by blathering on here - as I do - I've only managed to use three of them... I had, like, six. Their fate is unknown for now, but, I'll keep 'em on my desk for now. One is a strange apology and the other a strange 'lustration (I know, but I thought I'd try it).
From Marci's "... things you don't expect to hear from the backseat ..."
"If you stick your butt in my face, I am going to smack it."
That should probably be an algebraic axiom...
It's funny, the other day I said I'd be bothering you less here as things move forward. I guess I lied. In my defense, this was meant to be brief, but brevitiness (dammit) is not my strong suit. Thanks for coming by.
I think it's natural for kids to want more of their own space and have more of their own life as they get older - even if we the parents don't want it that way.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Schmuch is definitely a word!
I suppose it is a good thing you are not an English or Litrature Arts teacher. Or maybe that's a bad thing. Who knows. It's funny, I know more about my 11 year old son and his life than I do my 9 year old daughter. Different kids have different levels of openness. Or is it openess.
ReplyDelete